video ● tenth reflection

[straying]

[At first, she's quiet for a little while. She opens her mouth as if she knew what to say before but now that the camera's rolling, she's second-guessing it. And so there's a pause before she starts talking.]

Matthew's gone.

[... and she looks a little confused, as if she never expected to say those words. They sound so foreign.]

... sheesh. Can he ever leave without causing me problems?

Well, now you know.

[A bit of a shrug and she ends the feed.]

Comments

[aimforthesun.livejournal.com]

[Her words don't register immediately. And when they finally do, it still doesn't quite sink in. Instead, he just stares, because Matthew can't be gone—that has to defy a rule there somewhere. Matthew's been here from the start, like him. He can't be here when Matthew's not.

It just... doesn't make sense.]

What?

[His mind's not capable of forming something more intelligent right now.]

[girlpowertouka.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry, Saya-san.

[sweeperesque.livejournal.com]

[... awww, Billy. Yeah, her reaction was much the same when he didn't show up at some point in her day and then when she went to call him, his name wasn't there. Very 'what?'-worthy.

Still, she has to convince herself that it doesn't matter to her. Better to think that he doesn't matter to her. So all you get is a shrug.]

Yeah. Pretty weird, huh?

[She laughs.]

[sweeperesque.livejournal.com]

[She tilts her head at that.]

... for what, exactly?

Well, whatever it is, don't apologize. Not your fault, I'm sure!

[1/2]

[aimforthesun.livejournal.com]

[He doesn't say anything for a few moments, and it's clear that the gears are still turning in his head.

....

Matthew is gone.

—And finally, it clicks. Matthew, the first person he ever spoke to here, the person he expected would always be here—is gone.]

[2/2]

[aimforthesun.livejournal.com]

[... He shouldn't feel depressed over this, and yet he does.

In return for the laugh, Saya gets a smirk.]

Huh... and here I always thought he'd outlast me, for some reason.

[sweeperesque.livejournal.com]

[... poor kid.]

Hmm, you would expect him to stick around for a while, huh? Around Vatheon, at least.

But it's really funny how he leaves just as soon as you get used to him.

[And it's a little hypocritical of her to be sad over it.]

[aimforthesun.livejournal.com]

[... Just take away Naoya, and that'll likely make him the longest-lasting resident here. It's... a rather tiring thought.]

It's just like him, wouldn't you say?

[Still smirking, but it's clear as day how empty it is.]

[sweeperesque.livejournal.com]

[It's a sad time when Billy doesn't even try that hard to fake it anymore. She frowns.]

Yep. A lot like him.

... you gonna miss him?

[aimforthesun.livejournal.com]

[Immediately—]

No.

[girlpowertouka.livejournal.com]

Oh, no, I mean, like...it's an expression of sympathy?

[sweeperesque.livejournal.com]

Liar liar.

[She smiles sadly.]

It's okay to miss him, you know. You don't have to be fond of someone to be sad that they're gone.

[sweeperesque.livejournal.com]

Oh! ... Haha.

[She shakes her head and laughs. Jeeze, she's out of it.]

Well, don't worry about it. I'm not really in need of any sympathy right now. I'm A-OK.

[aimforthesun.livejournal.com]

I'm not sad that he's gone.

[sweeperesque.livejournal.com]

Tell your face to match your words, Billy.

[aimforthesun.livejournal.com]

[He scowls.]

You act like I actually cared about that guy.

[sweeperesque.livejournal.com]

I never said anything about caring.

Actually even clarified that you don't need to care about someone to miss them. Maybe you're bringing up the word for a reason?

[And then she moves on quickly, before he gets the chance to hang up the phone.]

But hey, it doesn't matter anymore, right? I'm starting to think that you can just kick back in this place and wait for the day you leave without any worries.

[aimforthesun.livejournal.com]

With any worries. Right. Ignoring all the stuff that this place likes to throw at us, that is.

[sweeperesque.livejournal.com]

Exactly that!

[point, what point]

[countrybeloved.livejournal.com]

[Silence]

... Sorry to hear that.

[aimforthesun.livejournal.com]

[He just sighs.]

Are you always this carefree?

[sweeperesque.livejournal.com]

[A wry grin.]

You and me both.

I think this place just got a bit more boring.

[sweeperesque.livejournal.com]

Is there any other way to be?

[countrybeloved.livejournal.com]

[He returns it.]

I think I can appreciate boring right now.

[aimforthesun.livejournal.com]

Would you like for me to fetch you a thesaurus and point you to the 'antonym' section?